I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
