i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
