Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
