I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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