should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
