This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
