So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
