Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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