how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
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