I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
