i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
