i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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