I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize