Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
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