Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
