Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
