Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
