Sponge bath it is.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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