Are we in a gay sports bar?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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