Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
as a side note pls kill me
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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