i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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