This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I party with great urgency now.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
