Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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