i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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