I think scott just propositioned me for sex
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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