just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize
