So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize