I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
It's official drugs can't kill me
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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