the condom got lost in my hair
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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