he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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