sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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