Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
me + whiskey = a bad person
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
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