just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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