I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Randomize
