I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
