But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
It's Friday. Sex?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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