Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I skipped work to stalk him.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
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