big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize