Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
