Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
