that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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