Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
