Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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