Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
