what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
