Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Randomize
