Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
