I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
