Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
