Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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