feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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