shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
