Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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